"When a soul recognises the will of God and shows a readiness to submit to it entirely, then God gives Himself to such a soul and renders it most powerful succour under all circumstances." - Rev. Jean-Pierre de Caussade

Friday, December 24, 2010

And the journey continues

I really don't want to sound depressing on Christmas Eve, buuuuut I have an update on the whole trying-to-get-pregnant thing. I've held off writing about it because there were other things going - house, foster care, puppy, etc. - and I was trying to keep my mind occupied on those things. So, I'll have to backtrack a month or two...

At the beginning of November, I saw my regular OB/GYN, just for a check-up and see if there was anything going on. I know I don't ovulate regularly, so that obviously cuts down our chances on getting pregnant. So, my doctor decided to put me on Clomid, which basically helps you to ovulate. He wanted me to take Clomid, and then estrogen, and then get an ultrasound done to see if I was about to ovulate. He also thought it would be beneficial to keep a chart of my cycle. This was about a week after I decided to stop charting. I kind of just went with it, figuring it wouldn't hurt. Well, the next day I woke up and started freaking out. I was finally content on just letting things happen, without charting and stressing over it - so the whole Clomid process made me feel like I was taking a step back (I'm not sure if I'm making any sense but I'll just roll with it). Thankfully, God put the right people in my life that day, and I decided to go ahead and take the Clomid. When I went to get my ultrasound done, I was pretty nervous because I really didn't feel like I was about to ovulate. But alas, they saw what appeared to be follicles and the nurse practitioner said it "looked promising" (my doctor was out of town that week, unfortunately).

On Tuesday, I got some blood work done - a progesterone level to make sure I ovulated and an HCG level to see if I was pregnant. My doctor called me with the results yesterday. The HCG test was negative, so I'm not pregnant - which doesn't surprise me, because you just know when you're pregnant (at least that's how it was the first time). My progesterone level was low, which isn't good since I'd most likely not be able to maintain the pregnancy if I did get pregnant. As if those 2 results weren't enough bad news, my doctor also looked at my ultrasound pictures and said it looks like I have polycystic ovaries. That causes problems with fertility, as I'm experiencing now, so my doctor increased the Clomid dose for my next cycle and I'm also going to start taking progesterone.

While the news obviously wasn't what I wanted to hear, I am very grateful that I decided to go along with the medication and tests and everything, because now we can try to fix the problems (although you can't fix polycystic ovaries, but whatever). It is all very frustrating, though, because next week marks a year since we lost Levi. That whole experience was hard enough, and still is, so the problems with my fertility just makes everything harder. I know one day this is all going to make sense, and I still haven't lost faith in God's plan for us. But I could really use some extra prayers right now.

In case I don't make it to the blog tomorrow, I hope you all have a safe and blessed Christmas. I'll be enjoying it with my wonderful husband, cute puppy, and the best family a girl could ask for. :)

When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul. - Psalm 94:19

1 comment:

  1. It's good to hear an about about this! I, too, have Polycystic ovaries... but we can talk more about this next week-- or i'd like to at least! Love and miss ya'll!


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