Logan and I are very, very thankful that Peanut is going to a daycare that has been working along with us to improve his behavior. Before he came to us, Peanut was kicked out of his previous daycare. And I'm fairly certain that 99% of daycares would have kicked him out already - but fortunately we picked one of the few that is hanging in there. [The director used to be a foster parent. Now how perfect is that??]
Many days I end up talking to the director and/or Peanut's teacher for a good 10 minutes when I pick him up in the afternoons. Today I was talking to both of them, and his teacher brought up a few points that will hopefully help me stop and think before I blow my brains out. Some of it are things I've thought about before, but somehow hearing someone else say it made it much clearer...
Peanut has spent the last (and only) 3 years of life doing whatever the heck he wants, whenever he wants. And in the last several weeks, we've basically told him that everything he's used to doing is wrong. Can you imagine? Spending your life thinking you're running the show, and then BAM. You have two foster parents who choose to discipline you, and suddenly you're not in charge. I guess we can't blame the little guy for being overwhelmed. I really, really need to remember that when Peanut gets upset over the littlest things. Which happens all.the.time. But like his teacher pointed out, we're pretty much re-programming his brain. That's a lot for a 3-year old to handle.
Peanut is obviously trying to hold on to some sense of control. I'm totally fine with him throwing his toys all around. And he can cry his eyes out as far as I'm concerned. But the whole banging his head on the wall or on the ground...not so much. It's getting worse, so we're definitely going to address it.
And I just have to say that God showered his wonderful graces upon me this evening, and I didn't raise my voice once. It's a miracle. Things spiraled downhill as they usually do (Logan got off work late so I was by myself), but I managed to stay calm and be consistent. Amen and Alleluia.
"Patience, prayer, and silence - these are what give strength to the soul." -St. Faustina