"When a soul recognises the will of God and shows a readiness to submit to it entirely, then God gives Himself to such a soul and renders it most powerful succour under all circumstances." - Rev. Jean-Pierre de Caussade

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Keep the nosy questions coming. NOT.

I know people are always asking personal questions and making comments about other people's families, but I thought that happened more to bigger families.

Well. Not so, apparently.

When people (who I've just met, mind you) see that we have Landon, who's still young, and are expecting another baby very soon, the questions start: "So are you done after this one?" "Are y'all planning on having any more?"

Let me just say that I personally do not care when people ask me these questions, because I'm an open book and am more honest than I should be, so I'll answer pretty much anything if asked (but I won't volunteer the information. Just saying.). Also, I DO NOT CARE what people think. One of the times this past week when asked about having any more kids, I made a comment about how my pregnancies sucked so I wasn't sure if I wanted to birth another baby, but that I was definitely interested in adopting.

This couple looked at me like I had two heads. Um, thanks. You asked!

Logan thinks I'm crazy for divulging that much information to people I just met. Whatev. I told you I'm an open book.

So, when asked the same thing by another couple I just met the following day (seriously, why are people so nosy?), I decided to make Logan happy and said with a laugh, "My pregnancies are rough. I can't answer that right now." Even though I know I will have another child, in one way or another, God-willing. Some people just can't handle that information, apparently.

Maybe I should just start telling people, "Oh yeah, we want at least 5 more kids!" That should shut them up, right? ;)

So anyway. The point I wanted to make is that we need to stop asking other people these deeply personal questions, because you never know what a family is going through. Infertility, pregnancy loss, job loss, etc. After I lost Levi, it took a year and half to get pregnant again. And the number of people that asked when we wanted to start a family was just ridiculous - they had no clue that we already had a son; he just wasn't with us anymore. The fact that we had been trying for so long too just added insult to injury.

And now that people are asking if we're "done" having kids (even though HELLO I haven't even given birth yet), I can't help but think that they have NO CLUE what we go through during each pregnancy. If they did, they would know that now is not the right time to be asking me those questions. Because seriously, right now I feel like I would go clinically insane if I were to get pregnant again.

But I also know that memories of my ridiculous pregnancies will fade. So while right now I can't say with certainty that I want to be pregnant again, it doesn't mean that it won't change in the future. Our boys will be older, Logan will hopefully have a different job with less crazy hours and less of a commute, and I will be holier and more capable of handling a difficult pregnancy.

Just kidding about that last part. My spiritual life is pretty sucky at the moment, if I'm being completely honest. Oy vey.

"The soul that aims at union with God should value all the operations of his grace, but should only attach itself to that of the present moment." - Fr. Jean-Pierre de Caussade

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