"When a soul recognises the will of God and shows a readiness to submit to it entirely, then God gives Himself to such a soul and renders it most powerful succour under all circumstances." - Rev. Jean-Pierre de Caussade

Sunday, June 8, 2014

What people never tell you about engagement

So I may or may not have promised some pictures from our engagement after the lovely post from our dating years. And if you don't care, wellllll, sorry. It's my blog and I do what I want. Our anniversary is in a few days so I got to post this baby first!

Instead of just boring you with pictures, though, I thought I'd also share a few things that surprised me about our 10 months of being engaged. So, here goes. Pictures and maybe TMI (you know me)…
 These 2 pictures are from our engagement session with Photography by Louis. He was fun to work with!
I just love how we were able to capture our Catholic faith in these pictures with the St. Louis Cathedral behind us as well as the beauty of New Orleans!

So. Engagement. Such an exciting time, for sure! But why did nobody tell us how hard it would be?!

Maybe part of it is because Logan and I were still in school. We got engaged at the end of July, and I graduated from nursing school that December. Logan didn't graduate until the following May, a few weeks before our wedding.

So in addition to finishing school, I was also thrust into my first big girl job as a registered nurse. Working the night shifts. Which I hated. Logan and I barely saw each other it seemed, and when we did, I had trouble staying awake because…night shift. Did I mention I hated the night shift?

Pretty sure I could have been diagnosed with depression during that time. Seriously.

Anyway. Let's break up the depression with some more pictures!
 My cousin got married a month before us…this was at their rehearsal dinner.

It seemed like everyone talked about how hard it was to plan a wedding. But honestly, it wasn't very stressful, in my opinion. Maybe because I wasn't that girl who's been planning my wedding since I was 6 years old. It was a lot of work, yes, but we kept things pretty simple, I think. After all, the marriage is more important than the wedding, right?!
And this was right before my cousin's wedding! I was a bridesmaid so it was pretty crazy to get to "practice" walking down the aisle a month before I did as a bride.

Logan and I were virgins when we got married, and although the chastity bit wasn't exactly easy when we were dating, it go SO MUCH HARDER once we were engaged. How the heck do people have long engagements? Seriously. 10 months is long enough.

I remember a priest telling me that engagement was hard because Logan and I had already made the commitment to marriage in our hearts, so it was only natural to want to make that commitment with our bodies. So, so true. Thankfully, though, God showered us with grace, and we even used the Lenten season to refrain from excessive kissing (and ended up extending that until our wedding). Sounds silly, I know, but I honestly think that was one of the best decisions we made. It allowed us to focus on the Sacrament as a whole...and not just the physical stuff. ;)

We were thrown a very lovely stock-the-pantry shower. Which really was awesome because Logan was still living with his parents and I had been living with my brother's family…so we didn't have much of anything for a house of our own.

As much as I knew Logan and I were supposed to be together, I had always felt a slight tugging towards the religious life (you know, being a nun). That was part of the reason we broke up for awhile during our college years. (I always thought God would call me to be a nun but it never happened.) And what surprised me is how the whole vocation thing came up again during our engagement. I loved Logan and wanted to marry him more than anything….but I couldn't help thinking about the religious life too. What the heck was wrong with me?!

I talked to a priest about it, though, and he reassured me that it was normal to have those thoughts as you got close to making vows - he went through the same thing right before being ordained a transitional deacon. Of course, I didn't know anyone else who had experienced the same thing other than this priest. But I guess God knows to put the right people in your life at the right time!
Our rehearsal dinner! We honestly had the best rehearsal dinner ever. It was a smaller version of a reception, basically, but just with our family and closest friends.

Engagement was hard, but in retrospect I realize it was good preparation for marriage itself. Especially because we were hit with the most tragic experience for us thus far just 6 months into our marriage. But if you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you already know that story!

And to think we're about to celebrate our 5-year anniversary! So crazy. But we are blessed. :)

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